Another different day.....

In the last post I was talking about how they were going to do a trial breathing on KZ where they turn the machine somewhat off meaning he is breathing on his own but a little oxygen is still going in. He did so well in fact everyone agreed that he was more comfortable when he was able to breathe on his own. So they left him on that mode on the machine the whole day planning on taking the tube out the next day. So they tried taking the tube out and he immediately struggled to breathe. They put him in a c-pap machine and he calmed down and his oxygen level came back up. The problem was they didn't have a mask that would fit his tiny little face so every time he moved it would fall off not giving the pressure he needed to help him oxygenate better. So.....they were getting ready to put the tube back in and had the ENT(ear nose and throat) doctor come in and put a scope with a camera down his throat to see if there was any damage from when they put the tube in in Gillette, WY. When they did that they found that he had a granuloma (A mass of granulation tissue, typically produced in response to infection, inflammation, or the pressence of a foreign object) the foreign object being the breathing tube. So he said the best way for that to be treated is not putting the tube in and letting it heal with time. So they decided not to put the tube back in after all so they put the c-pap machine back on.a few hours later they checked his co2 and noticed it was going up, not only that but his PH levels weren't quite normal so they didn't want to risk anything and decided to put the tube in. I know it's confusing....and frustrating. So a couple days later he had another bronchoscopy and the ENT doctor removed the granulomas. They weren't sure if they should do this because with more and more irritation, granulomas grow back. So with Kaizen still having the breathing tube in they have been giving him muscle relaxers and things like that so he doesnt move and so the tube doesn't irritate his throat.

They were planning on taking the tube out yesterday but saw his oxygen levels were going down just a little bit, they got an x-ray and it showed that his left lung had collapsed just a little bit. So they decided to wait so they can get his lung healed and more oxygenation can be present. As of right now the plan is to try taking the tube out tomorrow and see how that goes.

A lot is going on and everyday is different. My emotions are in a whirlwind and I feel like I have no control. I pray and pray all day everyday that good will come out of this. And I think it will. Together we are strong and our main goal is that Kaizen will be happy. That's all we want. It's amazing how even under sedating medication he still tries to smile at me. I make a face and he gives me this grin and his eyes say "o mom if I was awake right now I would give you a laugh that would put you to tears."  I know I have said this before but there is just something about our little KZ that affects the lives of so many. He has this way of pulling on people's heart strings giving them the inability to control the love they feel for him........little stinker, controlling our emotions. :)

I remember wanting to start a blog long before I actually started one......I just got as far as trying to come with a title and all that and just decided I didn't have the time or energy to do it. When Kaizen was born I remember having a strong feeling to reconsider my thoughts........I now know why. Without this blog I would be taking the opportunity for Kaizen to affect so many away.  This blog isn't just something I want to do to pass time.......I truly feel like its something I need to do in order to truly fulfill our lives.

I appreciate all of you who read and appreciate my words, my feelings, my thoughts. I know Kaizen is so thankful for all of you and can feel your prayers. I know we are going through a trial that could potentially crush a family in pieces.......but our little family.......each of us........We are strong. We are faithful. And we will be courageous.