been a while......

Wow it seems like it has been awhile since I have done a blog post. I need to be better at doing them because I know I will want to be able to look back on them later on.
I definitely don't blog as much as I did when Kaizen was here. At first it was really hard for me to do posts because he was my life, everything was always about him and that is exactly how I wanted it. When he left this world I just thought what is the point of blogging now....
But I still feel there is a reason Heavenly Father inspired me to start this blog and I know I need to keep at it. One good reason is for this cute little baby girl of mine. I know Kaizen would want me to continue for her.

So we haven't been up to much over here. Just trying to stay out of the cold and keep warm. We are getting ready to head to Utah on Monday for the Thanksgiving holiday. I just love getting together with family. It warms my heart! I love the Holidays!

Josh made our dog Buckley a nice dog house equipped with a heating lamp and all.......(heating lamp not shown but it works great!)

I'm so glad he finally has somewhere to stay warm. He loves it so far!

So we are just packing and getting things ready for the trip now. We plan to stay for about a week.

Random picture time........

Kanzis with her cousin TeeLie! He is so cute, he would just stare at her. This is him giving her loves and then the next one is him rocking her. Adorable! 

My sister-in-law and I went to a little boutique today here in Sidney. Let me just tell you......when you have a girl its basically common knowledge that you will go bankrupt! lol! There is so many cute things for girls! We got a few flower headbands for our little ones. We also got Christmas outfits for them. Oh my goodness I can't wait until next month when she can wear it. It is so cute!! 

For now lets have a good time celebrating Thanksgiving! After all, there is oh so much to be thankful for. Have a great weekend!

Kaizen's Birthday and a Halloween Party!

We just got back from a quick trip to Utah. We celebrated Kaizen's 2nd birthday and had a Halloween party!

It was hard to celebrate Kaizen's birthday without him here. As we sang happy birthday to him at his headstone I couldn't help but imagine what he would be like and what he would think about everyone celebrating a day just for him. I miss him so much. I still have days where it is really hard. Where I just want to stay in bed all day and shut the world out. It's hard, he has a part of me that will never be healed. It's like I have a permanent open wound, that if I'm not careful, and even when I am, can hurt so bad with just a tiny touch, a tiny word.

Having Kanzis does make it a little easier, she makes those days better. Maybe it's because when I look at her, I see a little bit of him. Because I know he is happy and smiling down on us. Because when I think of his smiling face, I feel joy. I love so much my sweet angel two year old.

I found this quote and wanted to share it. I very much admire the truthfulness of it's message.

"The death of a baby is like a stone cast into the stillness of a quiet pool, the concentric ripples of despair sweep out in all directions, affecting many, many people."  -John DeFrain

He is and will always be loved by so so many!

Happy Birthday sweet angel!

Now if you know me, you know that I LOVE Halloween! It's my favorite holiday and I get so excited every year!  My sister and I hosted our annual Halloween party at my Uncles house it was so fun! I am already totally excited for next year! Ya that's right.......totally!

We played Clue in real life. It took quite a while to finish and was kind of insane! But still so much fun.......as always with my family! :)

                                        

 ^ Seriously my husband is the best! He is such a good sport

when it comes to me and my crazy obsession on Halloween!

(for the record.....he picked this costume out himself, but with the

options....it was the best choice) :)

As for me and my excuse on the lame bee.......I had to pick something

easy for breastfeeding.....it's all I could find......worked great lol!

 

Kanzis with her great grandpa! I sure love my gramps!

So while it was so fun to visit family, and enjoy some fun activities......it is good to be back home.

Now we await the next trip back to Utah for Thanksgiving! :)



Our little model baby!

We had pictures of Kanzis taken when she was 6 days old by a lady in Roy, Utah and she did an amazing job! I must thank Ashley Lamph for reccomending her! She is awesome. Thanks Ash!! :)

Enjoy....

Her brother is always watching over her....



 .....and will always be right beside her. :)





I am so happy with how they all turned out! I love my little beauty! :)